no public napping / resistance is futile

i digress from the chronological order of these posts for just a bit because of a story i put down on paper yesterday and want to share - enjoy!

9/3/2013
today marks the first day in china that i reprimanded a chinese person.  we've been in china only a little more than a month and my grip on the concept that i am a foreigner visiting a culture outside of my own is quickly relaxing.  perhaps you've also wrestled with this phenomenon while traveling?  at what point do we consider ourselves contributors to the culture around us?  are we witnesses?  participants?  judges?

i rode my bicycle to auchan (a large grocery store) today and decided to visit the toilet before biking home.  not unusual to a bathroom in china is the presence of someone smoking a cigarette - today was no exception.  i might as well have smoked the butt myself as the small room, housing four urinals and four stalls, was blanketed in thick clouds of tobacco.  three signs, one between each urinal, clearly displayed a cigarette w/ a red slash through it surrounded by a red circle - the universal ghostbusters-style, no smoking sign.  i cough loudly twice, tap the signs with my fingers, and look him square in the eyes.  he smiles back, in a friendly way, as if i've just recited a line from a monty python skit - and then continues to smoke the butt down to the filter.  did i miss something?  is there some cultural norm here that allows a society of strict, rule-abiding people to tolerate clear violations to community, health-minded ordinances?

two days ago (sunday), after a delicious bowl of noodle soup w/ fatty pork belly (mmm...love that pork belly - right?) - ok, i admit, i finished basil and kayl's soup too (couldn't let it go to waste though it was only $1.50 per bowl).  anyhoo, we were all feeling a bit groggy after lunch and the prospect of a sunday afternoon nap under the shade of a tree sounded delightful (who's with me?!).  so we bike to suzhou park, a short ride from teng xideng's noodle house in old town.  to our dismay, the park has plenty of grass but "stay off please" signs as well - even had little picket fences surrounding the pockets of turf to underscore the request.  no worries - we make our way past musicians, dancers, and a beautiful pond w/ lotus flowers and goldfish.  families hug the shore of the pond w/ poles and bait and every couple of minutes land a little 3 inch goldfish for their pail - presumably to take home to the aquarium.  past the pond, several groups of old men huddle over checker boards smoking cigarettes and sharing strategies of excited, purported brilliance - a frenzy at times.  the checkers are decorated with different characters leading me to assume the rules of this game are supremely more elaborate than american checkers.  concrete benches perimeter the area from the trees, traffic is low, neighbors friendly.  we arrange on the benches so that the kids might lay down and use carly and i as pillows but after only a short while, their inability to find comfort brings them upright, giving me leave to find a napping position of my own.  i flop my backpack on the ground for my headrest and lay down on the pavers.  not a field of clover, but it'll do.  i start to drift off when a woman w/ a broom and pan kicks me gently and, via body language, lets me know that sleeping on the ground in the park, is not permitted.  we ask our neighbor, w/ help from a translator app on our phone, why i can't doze on the ground - to which he poses "why sleep in public?"  i'm stumped.  i let it go, unable to understand how a culture might not appreciate a little mid-day snooze in a quasi-natural setting.  i've seen laborers sleeping under bridges at noon when the sun is blazing - but not in parks - is that it?

apparently it's somehow acceptable to smoke a cigarette in a cramped, public bathroom while in the company of large, colorful "no smoking" signs - but not acceptable to rest my bones on a weekend in a public park.

perhaps i'll become a contradiction hunter during this stint in china - lord knows they're everywhere.

p.s.

on the way to teng xideng's noodle house we found the best mooncakes so far - mango and pineapple turned out to be our favorite.  ate a bunch then circled around for another pass, bought 6 more for the apartment but the kids polished them off in the park - so good!  btw, not all mooncakes are yummy - we've had plenty that weren't worth eating so finding this vendor was a treat for sure!

wishing you well from suzhou, china!